Building Trust

In trusting someone, an individual is securing a bond between another party, which creates a safeguard between the groups. Even if a weakness is exposed and that person may seem vulnerable, the individual will not be condemned due to his trust invested in that other group. Trust can be compared to an unspoken committment, stemming out of confidence and assurance, in which a relationship is formed. The problem with trust it is violated or we are taken advantage of, we have issues trusting again. As human beings we tend to base decisions on past experience. If we have endured a significant amount of emotional neglect or were betrayed multiple times in the passed, chances are we will be reluctant to trust someone. Sometimes we do not want to risk investing time in another and letting our guard down if we have been hurt before, especially if we were taken advantage of without any provocation (victim of circumstance).Through trust we are able to exchange non material possessions; a child entrusts their parent in exchange for safety and nourishment. Although we do not know specifically what we are receiving from the trusted party, a relationship is a barter and both ends must be providing something. This concept of reciprocity is not always immediate and often we grow impatient when our friends do not contribute something to the relationship. Beliefs among people who have been violated in situations are that noone can be trusted, they are alone or the world is out to get them. But their are ways to overcome these perceptions.

Our behavioral traits and attitudes affect how we trust. If we are positive and have faith in other people to be honest and fair, we will develop balanced relationships. Without hope in new beginnings, we would all become socially isolated. To truly believe that others will treat us as equals (faith in the fairness of life) is an essential belief in expression. If we think that we will be treated poorly by an individual, chances are our friendship would not flourish with that person because we have ulterior motives in the back of our mind and are reluctant to trust him/her. We must believe in ourselves and not fear other people’s opinions because fear stunts our emotional growth. The whole purpose of a relationship is to be able to express each other freely and not worry about being ostracized for a stupid comment. Blaming and accusing are actions that should not exist in any environment where trust is evident; principles such forgiveness and acceptance should be emphasized. Reducing competition amongst peers will lower any type of barriers and lead to mutual trust in the long run.

All of these traits could lead to better relationships and are steps on the path to building trust. Our experiences affect our ability to trust yet if we try to change our behavioral traits, we may be able to suppress any negative feelings we associate with trusting and look toward positive relationship building.